Caught be the act… (part 1)

So this is the first part of a story that maitriser asked me to write, as a task! he wanted me to practice writing a story in parts and to see if I could live each part at roughly 500 words. I was also to try my hardest with the spelling and grammar. The reason for this is I have somewhat lost my faith in my self when it come to writing over the last few weeks and have been being realy hard on myself. So here is the first part,  hope you like it!

Caught in the act.
“So, I’m leaving now “Conner says, in an overly loud voice from some were behind me. I let out what I hope is a distracted “hmmm, ok “. trying my hardest to not look heart broken that he is off to spend the weekend rock climbing and goofing about with his Gym buddies. So, I stay glued to my paper, having read the same 3 lines a thousand times in the last 15 minutes. He picks up his bag and stomps out the house slamming the door behind him. I let out a sigh of pent up frustration and sexual tension.
I have been living with Conner Mathews for just over 5 months. At first, he was just my cute and funny room mate, who moved in when Amanda moved out to live with her boyfriend. She had suggested him as she knew he needed a place to live and knew I needed a roomie. who in her words could handle my ‘quirks’? But after a night of drinking and a slight break down, due to seeing my ex with his bimbo white trash girlfriend. We became good friends. But last month after coming home early with a head ache. I was not feeling great. walking around in a daze, straight in to the bathroom and straight in to a very wet and naked Conner, drying off from the shower. Ever since then I have been lusting after him like a stupid school girl.
So, when he said he was away for the weekend I kind of felt relieved. 3 days of not having to avoid looking at his tight ass, that flat stomach, with it’s 6 pack or those wide shoulders and strong arms. Not to mention that handsome face, deep blue eyes, and smile. God I’m worse than a teenager.
So, 5 minutes after he left I have striped down to my panties and cami, a Tom Hardy film on for a little inspiration. Lounging on the sofa, I let my mind wander a little. But it only gets as far as Bloody Conner. Those eyes of his boring in to me, making me wetter than I have ever been and making all the nerve endings in my body buzz. My hand falls to my cami and the swell of my breast. I stroke the underside of them, then trace the lace with me finger tip, and tease and pinch my nipples. Pulling my right breast out from my camie, I continue to play with my nipple. My other hand travel downwards, over my tummy, over the curve of my hip along the top of my black lace panties. my hand slips inside them, in to the folds of my clean shaved sex. finding that lit nub of delight, my head turns to the side and I open my eyes and let out a moan.
It is then I see Conner’s sun glasses on the coffee table, just as I hear the front door open and Conner’s voice saying, ‘I only forgot my sun glasses Mel, just back to get them’ and then his shocked gasp at finding his house mate mid wank in the living-room of there shared house.

Hugs ,

Pixie x

Masturbation Monday.

 

nee mm

Pixie’s Prompt – three questions, 300 words.

Pixie’s Prompt – three questions, 300 words.
Answer the 3 questions in 300 words or less, but giving reasoned answer.

1) An important person in your life: My Great Aunty May. Simply because she is an amazing woman. Strong minded, open, and clever. She has taught me some many things about being who I am. She is a feisty lady, who is farce and brave, even when she’s not. But the thing I love about her the most is the fact she has been there every step of the way of my recovery. From hospital, to coming home, to remarrying and becoming a mum, she ha been there. Oh, and she can tell the boss man what to do!

2) A thing your life has in excess: Love, my life is full of love. Whether that is giving love, being loved, or feeling love. Some many different types of love. For friends, lovers, family, or my babies. I never thought it was possible to feel this much love and I’m a very blessed lady to have this amount of love in my life.

 

3) How you procrastinate: Well I don’t really! No, I do, but I also must have a lot of structure in my days, or I feel very stressed and like I’m just waiting time. That would then make me panicky and anxious and no one wants that. I guess I do like Pinterest and twitter quite a lot. I also enjoy stripping down to my panties and a t-shirt, turning up the music and dancing round the kitchen. Also, a big fan of taking long baths and naps. But then I am also happy to spend the day writing or to clean for a few hours. For me life is about balance and priorities.

See i can write something in under 300 words!

Hugs,

Pixie

Anger is an energy…

Anger is an energy.
Right let me start by say, yep totally ripped of John Lydon book. Now moving on to what this blog post is about shall we?! Well in a nut shell it’s about anger, how people see and treat it, and how it affects me and how I deal with it.
Anger is kind of the elephant in the room for a lot of people or a sort of forbidden emotion. I mean pretty much every other emotion is accepted, if not welcome. But poor old anger is always seen as a negative emotion and something you’re not meant to show. But like all things we try to keep hidden, when it finally comes to the surface it can be messy, hurt people and really fuck you up if you don’t deal with it. The way I look at it is, that anger is not always a negative thing, it is a very strong emotion with a lot of energy behind it, needing careful handling, but should not be feared, as we all at some point feel anger.
For me anger was and is a big part of my life, that I work hard on controlling. I know that may sound shocking to some, as online pixie is sweet and innocent, cute and little. With maybe the odd rant or rude word here and there. For the most part you would be right, but the is another side that you don’t see and that is the angry Pixie, who rants rages and has been known to throw plate at the boss man. I know shocking right?! But I am only human, and it is only natural to get angry sometimes. But for me anger has or did for a long time have a negative impact on my life. I was not allowed to show anger at home growing up. My mother would never allow it and my daddy would turn his anger on me in the form of a beating or horrid word. when I hit my teens, I started to have angry outburst, that I now know were due to not dealing with abuse and with having Anxious ADD. But I was lucky that some one saw this and I got sent to an anger magnet therapist and learnt ways to deal with it
For my anger has a few different Face. The is Mrs grumpy face that people get when I’m tired, feel unwell or get woken up by the phone at 6 am. Then the Rage monster, this is when I get mad at people being treated unfairly, people hurting those I love or some numpty cutting me up oh the rounder bout. It is normally accompanied with a lot of swearing, shouting and hot air. Then we have anxious, broken brained angry Pixie. I don’t now when or what this looks like, not as my brain switches off and I can’t function. I have been told I become short, extremally critical and rude with people. Then the is to me the scariest type, the silent sighing type, that I turn in on myself. It’s the one I get when I feel I have fucked something up or not done enough. It is my self-critical side and it frightens the crap out of me. it has in the past led to self harm, anxiety attack, and a few times trying to take my life. It is spiteful, rude, and aggressive and it is always turn in on me. It led to me losing my friends, disliking myself and not try anything.
But with everything I need to do in my life, I say, I’m working on it. Its not gone, but I am living with it. I did this by meeting it head on, challenging it and fighting it. I won’t let it rule my life and I do not deserve to fell like it makes me feel.
I have ways to deal with it, that I have learnt in therapy and from maîtriser. They are:
• Breath – Ok so deep breathing works amazingly well for so many things. But I also have a little mantra I say while doing deep breathing, it is ‘Breath just breath. Keep moving forward, take baby steps if you have too. But keep moving and just breath.’ Saying this brings me back down to a normal level of meness.
• Time out – So yes, I give myself time outs. Simply as turning my phone off, iPod on calming music and I go sit and calm down for 20 mins, not talking or interacting with anyone.
• Walk it off – Again as simple as putting my shoes on and taking a dog for a walk. I come back, and I’m calm and not going to kill anyone.
• Scream about it – Ok so this is always as simply as screaming. It normally involves the boss man taking me to the gym, stick loud music on and making me spare with him. The is highly stress reliving about kicking the crap out of someone.
• Talk or write about it – I see a therapist every 2 weeks and blog as a way of keeping a lid on things.
• Hug it out – ok so this is pure and simply my nana’s idea! When I was a kid, if I got angry instead of telling me off or shouting at me and resulting in me getting angrier. She would make me hug someone. Normally my granddah, her or my great, great aunty win. It was her belief and now mine that you can’t stay mad if your hugging someone.
So that is my take on anger and how I deal with it. I know it must seem a little strange to some but for me it really does work!

Hugs,
Pixie x

Pixie’s #SoSS , spreading some love.

So this week has been really hard for me on a lot of levels. I landed myself in hot water with the boss man. (Oppss i did it again, well sort of! ) . Then on the morning of New years eve morning I had a slightly break down, resulting in in a lot of tears, ranting and admitting that I am depressed and struggling, again ( And all at once im sad again ). this lead to the boss man stepping in and insisting I went and saw my CPN, he even took time off work and came with me. We talked it all through and I now have a plan of action to get me back on track! ( Me and my broken brain – fighting on ) But on the flip side to all that , I have sat down with the Boss man and set some goals and targets for the next 3 months, and planning how to achive them. I was even allowed to get the sticker and gell pens out!!!

This brings us on to this weeks #SoSS post. The boss man has set me a goal of writing a #SoSS post each and to 5 new blog post a day. The blog posts can be anything I want and I can do my #SoSS can be any style I want. So this week I thought I would conpine both. what I have done is taken my favoirte blog post from each day and saved it as a link , then by the end of the week my #SoSS post pretty much wrote it’s self! so here we go….

Baby, baby , by the other Livvy.

So I read this on sunday, after spending 3 hours crying and I clicked on it as I had a picture from one of my favorite Podcast , The Guilty Feminist. After 1 paragraph I was nodding along as I read. it’s about not being sure about having babies or not wanting a ‘baby’ , but a child when you get to do nice parts of being a mother. I so understand that, babies can be and are hard work. they spend most of their time sleeping, eating , pooping , peeing and puking. it then goes on to talk about the worries about being pregnant and how much stress it puts on the mother’s body. Again I so understand this to. Having just had twins , I know just how hard being pregnant is. Yup, it has fun parts and yup you get a baby at the end of it . But the swollen ankle, back ache, breathlessness and just the sheer anomaly of it is , well it can be hell. So I loved this post for being so open and honest about the feeling and emotions that go through so many womans heads when it comes to having babies, but normally are too scaired to say. So thank you for saying everything I felt!

twisted fairy tale no2, by Posy Churchgate

So this is a fab erotic fairy tale romp , by the awesome Posy churchgate. I read this n the car coming back from the seaside on Monday, after asking if anyone had a fun and sexy story on twitter . Posy , point me to this, and I got blown away. Smart, sexy, funny and with a great feel and uses of word I loved it! it has even made me think of writing or trying to write a sexy fairy tale myself!

The other socail network, by Molly Moore, Molly’s daily kisses

So this is a pic of the lovely Molly Moore. it is her most liked picture on Instagram for 2017. she went on to discus how weird Instagram is , how fiscal it can be, and how bonkers the censoring is. Well written a nd makes you think, but also shows how stunning miss more is. Great role model for the body positive and sex positive fight! Thank you for sharing.

He was vast, by the Bar fly poet, Joseph A. Pinto. 

Ok so yeah not kink, but…. I just loved this poem so much. Written by Joseph Pinto, the cofounder of the Pen of the Damned , I have been a fan of his work for some time now. He started a new project , the bar fly poet , with verse inspired by his time sitting in bars and people watching. the poem come from a collection of work that is based on people DM something that has pained them, he then takes that and write fabulous poems , turn their pain in to beautiful word. So I had to include this one, it could not be helped!

Untrustworthy Heart, By Scandarella

Ok this got picked not for it being sexy kink, but because it is a stunning piece of writing and it moved me to tears. It just so pure and straight forward, Thank you so much for sharing!

FemDom Friday: Don’t Be Swayed By The Stereotypes, Floss Does Life.

So I love floss’ writing and this piece is awesome. It’s all about stereotypes of FemDoms, and she has got it spot on, Again! she makes a point that you can be any sort of female do you want, not just the hard . latex clad bitch type. oh and at the end you find out that this is actually part of a 12 part series she is writing and the next part come out on the 2nd of feb, So YAY!

How to be a good couple to a threesome with Coffee and kinky.

Great on post on how to be a good couple to a threesome. It basically says talk about it first, in depth, be prepared , and don’t be a dick! well written with humor . I was nodding and smiling the whole way through reading it .oh and its great advice to boot!

So that is my first #SoSS post of 2018!

Pixie x

The search for bedtime stories, Mood boosting and Smiles!

When I saw this weeks wicked Wednesday prompt was all about spreading the love for other blogs and bloggers, well I got rather excited. I love spreading the love of things that make me happy. Maîtriser says, when I love something or someone, I turn in to a little cheerleader. Lol that must be why I always cheer about him and the girls quite so loudly! (well they are awesome!). So, I decided that I would spread the love for my favourite blogs, cos they are also awesome and so worthy of a pixie cheer!

So, the first blog that I want to shout and cheer about is the epic CandySnatchReviews. This lady is funny, smart and I love the way she writes. Her product reviews are detailed, thought out and you know she really tested them out. Her sinful Sunday pictures, are nothing short of breath-taking and her candysnatch chats are not only informative, but funny at the same time. Her post about taking a sexy selfie, has led to me taking selfies and texting them to the boss man at work! but the biggest reason I love her blog is that she is full of body positivity and conference, that is contagious. Being a girl with body image issues and living with two other girls who struggle with self-esteem, reading her post has started to undo some of the damage that has been done over the years.

Next up is the wonderful blog of Cara Thereon. Now this lady is funny, witty, clever and has a very positive out look on life. She is submissive, is in a ldr with her daddy, and it is a poly, open relationship, so she is kind of on my level. She writes some very sexy things, that have led to some lovely times with my head between kitten’s legs! Her stories have now become a favourite of ours as are bedtime story. Again, the boss man is happy for us to read her blog, as she I polite and respectful of others and loves how her and her Dom are together.
Next is the blog of the very funny and charming John Brownstone Now I’m going state at the start, the are two blogs of male dominates that I can follow and read. One is Sir beasty’s and the other is John Brownstone’s blog. His blog is full of musing of a dom, on his life with his baby girl, kalya Lords and on life in general. He seems to have a very refreshing take on things and everything seems to be met with humour and thoughtfulness. I mean he even says when he gets things wrong. the boss man lets as read and comment, cos he likes the banter and he’s style of treating other people’s submissive. (with respect and humour)

The next blog I want to shout about is one of my favours to sit and read when I need cheering up or my mood boosting, and that blog is the wonder of Floss does life. Or as my aunty may calls her, that jolly nice lass off the ProudToBeKinky Podcast. Floss writes some very hot erotic fiction, that again has become some of are best loved bedtime stories. But the thing I Adour is her musings on life. She can put in to words, things that I think and can’t put in to words. the boss man lets me read and follow this blog, as he thinks she is a very good kink portative role model and act in a ladylike manner.

Lastly, but not least Has to be Girl on the net.. Just a great blog, full of giggle, things to make you think and ponder. The writing found in this blog is nothing short of perfection and was one of the blogs that inspired me to start blogging. The boss man lets me follow her blog, as he likes her writing and her outlook on life.

I could go on, and on about some other blogs till the cows come home, but I would be here forever. The are some many amazing blogs out there, that teach, support, and inspire me. Since I start this blog a little under a year ago, I have learnt some much about blogging, from other bloggers and can’t wait to see what the coming year will be bring.

Hugs,

Pixie x x x x

Wicked Wednesday!

WW badge

Day 19 of the Submissive’s Advent Calendar , by submissive guide – Seen but not heard.

Hello my lovely friends of the interweb! how are you this fine day? what have been up to? I myself  have been a very busy . I had an English lesion, breakfast with my boss, tidy and cleaned the spare room, waxed lyrical about jam, eaten jam, and loved my babies! I also tried to pic my little dog spidie up, all 3 kg of her and buggers my back, to the point I had to call Kitten to help me get off the floor and get my ciro to do a home visit. Turned out not to be my back but my hip popped out of line, ouchies later and now move, all be it looking like I have been kicked in the bum!

Anyway back to the task in hand , If I can stop thinking about jam . right todays focus was the saying ‘children should be seen and not heard’. the first activity was called Quiet Bells. The idea was to attach bells on to your person and to see how quietly you could move and see what you noticed. the second was called Quiet voice. the aim was to speak and act in a quiet calm manner as much as you could for the day . now I read todays activities to maîtriser at breakfast, and him being in a mood for testing me, decided that I could do both! (his in a grumpy cos his not allowed to go skiing)

So he adapted the quiet bells activity a little, I was allowed to wear one of leather collars today, that locks and has a bell on it! most of my collars have bells on them for the very reason of this activity or as maîtriser says , so he knows where I am and what I’m doing! I was also allowed to wear the little cuffs that we put bells on too! at first I was jingling all over the shop and it made me very a wear that I was stomping round the house and being a little clumsy and loud. So I tried taking small step and listened for the jingle, and it was less. strangle making the effort to make less noise while moving , left me feeling calmer. having bells on my cuffs meant I learnt how flipping much I move me hands around when I talk with my hands and how hard I can hit the keys on my laptop when typing. so I try to cut back on both of them, but it did mean sitting on my hands a lot!

For the quiet voice activity , well I really loved this. I have a form of autism , and one of the things I really struggle with is the tone and volume of my voice. So this task made me practice me tone and volume , and that is a really good thing! also by being a little quieter and more softly spoken meant that I used please and thank you more, smiled more and giggled rather than use my Wally laugh! maîtriser said he likes it when I talk , rather than shout, and I got an extra reward sticker today for being calmer and even more polite!

So today has been great fun and really made my think, so I cant wait to see what tomorrow brings!

Night all .

Pixie x x x x

Something wicked this way comes…. The winner is…..

Well it’s finally here! I have to say a massive thank you to all the writers who took part and to are wonderful judges , for not only putting a lot of effort , but also putting up with my lack of focus and organisation. Life , family and babies have all been rather crazy and have left me stinking and sucking a lot!

So the winner is (Drum roll please) ……

Something Wicked This way Comes, By Floss (off the proudtobekinky podcast) – a wonderful story that hooked the judges from start to finish. Written with style and passion , it flows beautifully! Well Done Miss Floss.

Judges choice:

Sir Beasty – Deeping hall , by Cousin – Very well written , great attention to detail and fabulous to read.

John Brownstone – chilling me softly, Posy Churchgate.- Drew me in from the start and i was left wondering if the cat had transformed in to the mysteisous lover.

Mark Stienwachs – Something Wicked, by Floss. – beautiful story , that leaves you griped from start to finish.

Pixie’s Pick – Fallen Angle – A gem of a story that I loved reading. Thank you for sharing it with us all!

So that’s the winners, think we might do something for Valentines Day people!

Hugs,

Pixie x x x x

Ps – stories will be published in the morning!