3 weeks down , 1 to go!

Well I have made it through another week of punishment and lived to tell the tale! was quite a good week on the whole, been some ups , but the has also been a few lows! Both the twins are doing good, everyone at home are awesome and I found out tonight that one of my best friends Emit Is coming to stay for Christmas and New year! I have also got 5 advent calendars! But the have been downs as well. I had to get blood work done , as I do every month. It all came back clear except for me being low on iron and folate, which I pretty much knew, so i’m on iron and flote pills ): I had a wobble , that led to me having a full on panic attack, that I had to take meds to get out of ): I got court swearing , a lot and got given the hair brush. ): I also had a ‘I hate my face’ day, that was really not a lot of fun ):  I also have to confess that my head is telling me  I don’t need to take my meds, well my anxiety and depression meds. but I have been really good and told / talked to people about it. lol the help I got from peeps on twitter was amazing! (ladies you know who you are!)

So with all this I mind Maîtriser has come up with some interesting and fun punishments and rules for this coming week! He’s  calling it the refine, define and shine week. I’m calling the Self-in-flaitted-ego week, but hoo hum! Changes / rules / tasks as follows!

  • No swearing what so ever. Punishment for each swear word , 5 from babe a the paddle.
  • 1 early morning , 1 post work out and one bed time selfie to be posted. no make up or filters.
  • Daily affirmation to be said.
  • Free time is back , but is to be used for something fun and relaxing. eg Craft , reading or writing prompt.
  • I am to rewrite my about page, using only prospective words.
  • Spelling list and reading for 30 mins a day to be done.
  • 30 mins yoga every morning followed be 10 mins meditation.
  • 2 gym sessions with Steve (core and cardio) And one sparring session with John.
  • Do daily tasks for my submissive advent Callender (starting on Friday)
  • Start the pattern for Christmas party dress.
  • Dentist appointment made and attended.
  • Write for #MM #Wickedwednesday #KOTW.
  • Plan, tidy and finish a writing space for myself.
  • Daily self-care task to be given and done daily .
  • Afternoon nap to be taken between 3 and 4pm , babies permitting.
  • Christmas list to be written , by Friday.
  • To wear what is layed out for me each day.

I also get to go on a girl date and we are all going to dinner and dancing on Saturday night to celebrate our 1 year wedding anerverseryy.

Now this is where you guys get asked to help! if by any chance I swear on here or twitter the boss man would like to know! So if you see it , drop him a line at antoine.beaulac.1965@hotmail.com.

So that’s my week , have a good one guys!

Hugs,

Pixie x x x x

Reading, thinking and 1 – 5, take two!

So the #SoSS post I used as a reading list was Kayla Lords post for Loving BDSM.  Showing kinky love for #SoSS issue 2 As always with anything Kayla writes it is a great post , that is honest and straight forward, well written and full of meaning. Full of praise for some pretty epic blogging !

Thoughts on Subspace (and other headspaces), Floss does life. – So this is a great little post by Floss off of the ProudToBeKinky podcast . Floss has a way with words that always makes me smile and has a great insight in to kink. She really got the whole feeling of Subspace and Ropespace. (would not know about the whole Domspace thing cos I can’t do Dom) I just really enjoyed reading this!

30 Days of D/s days Seven through 11 by Witty – So this was a blog that is new to me, though we have been friends on twitter for a couple of months. This post is well thought out , beautifully written and very moving! it takes a lot to make me cry but this did the trick. Will defiantly be stopping by more often to read her stuff!

What Do You Think About Orgasm Control? by Selina – Love , love , love this post! A true little , writing in a charming and natural way. It just make your heart sing and puts a smile on your face! Reminds me a lot of my little bear!

Heavenly Silk by Cammies on the Floor – Some great, extremely steamy erotica written for the #KOTW meme. Blimey , it really did get me hot and bothered! adds the Boss Man says thank you!

So now my 1 -5

Crappy thing – I had a really bad attack of gastric nasties, due to me not reading the instructions on my antibiotics.

Good stuff –

  1. I have finally written all the thank you notes for the baby gifts!
  2. I get to have a lay in tomorrow!
  3. I have a gym session with Steve!
  4. I get to spend the day with my mother in-law next week!
  5. I remembered to take meds to help my tummy and I felt better after a nap, drink and a couple of polo!

So that was my Tuesday reading done and my 1-5 , lets see what Wednesday brings shall we?! Same time and place tomorrow???

Hugs,

Pixie x x x x

 

 

 

 

Reading, thinking and 1 to 5 –

Last night (Sunday) after maîtriser told me new rules / punishments, I was sat thinking about them and the #SoSS  post on twitter. One of the things I have to do this week is read at least 3 blog post a day and then discus them with either maîtriser Or Babe . I had an idea, I love the blogs I follow , but I sometimes get a little overwhelmed by the amount of awesome post , I mean the are so many of them , where would I start! Then I had a light bulb moment , why not use the #SoSS posts! then I get help picking what to read and I know I’m reading the cream of the crop! So I asked maîtriser if I could do that and it was met with a smile, nod of his head and kiss. The fact he said ‘that’s   a good girl , think outside the box, I’m so proud of you’ was a huge bonus! (:

So yesterdays #SOSS was the Lovely and very talented Candysnacthreviews . I chose to use her #SoSS candy’s pick and mix 4. Just want to say that as always it was beautifully written and layer out I an extremely inviting way.

Getting Lucky – Scandarella – Story Written for Masturbation that is so hot I may have had to calm myself down , twice! Beautifully written , great visualisation and exquisite use of language. Love every second of this and I even read it to the girls as a bedtime story last night!

Crying after sex:two stories – Girl on the net. – Such a relatable piece of writing , that was so emotive that I had a lump in my throat and by the end I had tears streaming down om y checks. I think that anyone who has ever suffered with depression or anxiety well of felt this and this just sums up those feelings so perfectly.

Living With Invisible Bisexuality When You Look Hetero – Cara Sutra – Yet another piece that I could whole heartedly relate to! Being bi and poly myself , I look for the best like a normal(ish) hetro female. I had never stopped and really thought about it that much before, but I do. it also kind of makes why people are so shocked when they see me and kitten or little bear kissing in public! Thus really made me stop and think about it

Rosie Heart – Why i love doing sex work (and why it should’t mater) – A very thought-provoking and genuinely moving piece of writing . It made me look at sex workers in a different light completely (not that I looked down on them or anything like that) Really loved this and will be reading more of her stuff!

The Oooh Review!!! Leatherette Vixen Full Body Harness Review – Really awesome review of a product that not only made me want to try it , but made think ‘ I really want to review stuff, I just don’t have the guts!’ So bravo!

I also have to do as punishment my nana’s 1 to 5 thing . Which always makes me smile , even when I don’t want too!  So here we go with that.

Bad / crappy thing or thought – My sisters think I’m mad for not wanting to share a nanny with them and cos i would rather uncle fred or the girls watched the babies.

Good things.

  1. I manged to go get my blood work done without freaking out or fainting. I took the babies with me and walk to the hospital (3o min walk) and got the bus home.
  2. I have applied to do start my writing class again in the new year, for 2 hours on a thursday morning. maîtriser can work from home one day a week and has agreed to watch the girls for a morning.
  3. I have finally got my Christmas baking sorted out and have a kitchen full of christmas cakes!
  4. i have scheduled 5 post on this blog for this week. (well i think i have but you never know with me!)
  5. I feel much happier in myself after getting back to doing yoga and meditation every morning. i also cant wait to get back to the gym this week, even if it’s only core work and cardio!

W

2 weeks done, 2 to go!

So I made it through 2 weeks of punishment with no fuck ups or extra punishment! YAY PIXIE! It’s been a hard week on a lot of fronts , but not due to punishment. No any hassle I’ve had has been from my sisters and on a professional front , and that is all sorted now. It’s felt strange and odd to have to let others do stuff and not do it myself, but the house is still standing, we are not facing financial ruin, and the world is still turning!

This week Maîtriser wants me to work a little on myself and my self-esteem. I have a lot of issues around how I see myself and how I think people see me. This stems from being bullied pretty badly at school, ill-health and being in an abusive relationship cfor way to long. I guess I got in to the mind set of if people call you fat or ugley or stupid enough times , you start to believe it and I did for a long time. but over the last few years I been working with a therapist to challenge these thoughts and beliefes , but they still flare up at times and sometimes they can start to do harm again. being truthful they have started to be a problem over last few weeks , but I try to keep them hidden and not talk about them.  But i’m not going to any more and i’m actually looking forward to working on them a bit over the next 7 days! So here are this weeks rules / punishments.

  • I am to read 3 blog post of my choice everyday and disscuse them with maîtriser or Babe in the evening. I may also comment on the post online.
  • Weekly Writing prompt to be done by Thursday (800 words)
  • Daily mindfulnesss tasks and brain training (30 mins)
  • English lessons 3 times with John.
  • 2 gym sessions with Steve (cardio and core)
  • 30 mins of yoga plus 10 min meditation.
  • Write a goal list for the next 6 months
  • Write an eating plan for myself for the next 4 weeks.
  • Daily diary to inculed all food , activety and sleep.
  • Christmas party dress pattern and fabric shopping to be done .
  • daily tasks to be given in the morning by maîtriser. ]
  • 1 to 5 to be done every time I have a negative thought about myself.

I have also  got to work on my swearing and loosing my temper with myself. So if anyone catches me swearing or grumping, wag a finger at me!

Well lets see how we go!

Hugs,

Pixie x x x x

Saturday night fess-up / punishment.

Well here we again. It’s Saturday night, I’m in bed at 9.30 and I’m being made to write a blog post , fessing up to all the rule breaks I have had this week and telling you what punishment has been handed out too. I have a very cross and grumpy boss man sat behind me to make sure I do it all, just so and don’t skip anything. I should say having to sit and write I did is part of the punishment. Cos I find it so hard to admit and it is one of the quickest ways to change my behaviour.

What I did…..

  • I put myself down 17 in one day.
  • I refused to let little bear help with the cleaning .
  • I did not give the girls chores on 3 days in the last 7.
  • I grumped at Babe, Uncle Fred and Aunty May.
  • I sassed Maîtriser and Sir Beasty on at least 5 occasions.
  • I went over my allowed step count on 3 days out of the last 7.
  • I forgot to eat my snacks on 5 different occasions .
  • I did not check my blood sugar level before bed twice , leading to hypo.
  • I skipped my afternoon nap 5 times in the last 7 days.
  • I did not do my mindfulness at all for the last 7 days.
  • I stayed up past my bed time twice and got up before 6 am 3 times in the last 7 days.
  • I answered emails asking if I was free to take on new clients without showing or asking maîtriser for permission
  • I have started to swear and lose my temper with myself.
  • I have not done any of my self-care task for 7 days.
  • I ate fast food without asking if it was ok.
  • I did not eat enough on 3 days out of 7.

punishments are…..

  • No Free time for 7 days.
  • No answering back, I must do exactly as I’m told, first time. For the next month.
  • all emails must be checked by maîtriser or Babe before the are sent or replied to.
  • No junk food or fast food for the next month.
  • Only one sweet treat a day for the next month.
  • I am to stick to 8000 steps a day and 30 mins of yoga a day for the next 7 days.
  • my bedtime is 10pm and I may not get out of bed before 6am without asking first for the next month..
  • I will take my afternoon nap between 3pm and 4.15pm every day for the next.
  • I will do my self-care and mindfulness with Kitten everyday for the next month.
  • I am to wear my locking collar all the time, except when I have dates with uncle fred or the midwife.
  • I to eat what I am told every meal for the next month.
  • maîtriser will give me a list of chores every evening, I must divide them between myself and the girls for the next month.
  • I am to post on my blog every day ,about  something that maîtriser tells me to.
  • No swearing or sassing , anyone at anytime.
  • I must say ‘Good morning’ and ‘ Good Night’ to Twitter everyday for the next month.
  • I am to email this to everyone in my address book.
  • I will wear what I am told every day for the next month.
  • I will let maîtriser check my Blood sugar levels every day , before bed for the next month.
  • I will promise to take better care of myself and not neglect myself anagin.
  • *should Connie or Evie need me at anytime I may go to them and look after them without having to ask first.

Well that is that then. I know this has to be done and I know it is done out of love. Maîtriser only ever has my best interested at heart. I will Behave and be his good little mouse.

Hugs,

Pixie x x x x

The diary of Pixie Heart – 29/5/17 to 4/6/17

So here is my diary from last week! it seems to mainly be about babies, food and fucking , but that seems to be what my life is full of at the moment! Hope you enjoy and have a giggle at my what I call ‘life’. lol

Mouse’s Diary:

Monday 29th May 2017: 5.30am – I have woken up feeling very needy and horny. But after last night’s telling off I don’t know if it’s ok to wake you up or not L Going with it being ok or a least that telling you is ok?!?!

6.30am – Right choice mouse! Got a shag and cuddles! Hustled straight in the shower with little bear and told no touching!

6.45 am – out shower to find my green fern print playsuit, matching pink bra and panties, and pink cardia laid  out waiting. Babe is on the case of trying to get my hair to coaptate and doing makeup!

7am – Pills taken, neb done, bs level 4.1. Breakfast made for me, by you. I had fruit and yoghurt, two slices of whole grain toast and a boiled egg. Reading to Aunty May.

7.30am – Walked belle, on lead for 45 mins. Puffed out when I got home. Cuddled on the sofa with kitten and watched the news. I still feel daft that I don’t understand it allL

8.45am – Home work time! Thank you for sitting with me and helping me with it. I get lost with it sometimes, but I don’t feel silly when you help me!

10.45am – Snack time – glass of milk, two breadsticks, a carrot, stick of celery, 5 radishes and 3 tbsp. of hummus. Back to writing a blog post.

11.55am – Thank you for letting me do the laundry. I know I must take it easy and rest up, but I also love doing the cloths washing, I find it calming!

1pm – BS level 5.2. Lunchtime. Grilled cheese sandwich, tomatoes, and spinach salad, with olive oil and balsamic vinegar. Bananas and custard!

1.45pm – Walking at the park. Aunty May stayed home with Little bear as her tummy is still poorly. Its’s so lovely  here. I wish we could stay. I really don’t want to go home and face my family in a few weeks!

3pm – Ok afternoon snack of an ice cream and strawberry sundae rocks!

3.30pm – Nap times with Kitten and little bear! All tucked up and I was out like a light in under 5 mins, tied little mouse! Proof you really do know what’s best! Love you x x x x

4.45pm – Yay I get to cook with my little bear! Thank you, I do love cooking for the family and if the bear helps I feel like im teaching her something that is useful and worth while!

6pm – Veggies lasagne, salad, garlic bread for dinner and apple pie and ice-cream for pudding!

7pm – Bath time with Kitten! Clean jammies, slippers on and munch made! Time for DVDs in the family room (We need one of these when we move!)

9pm – Why has Aunty May gone to bed at 9 in the evening? Why are you looking so smug?

10.30pm – Ash so it was Subby practice in the living room you had planned, was it?! Ok So super fun, I was brave and a good girl! Cuddles with Kitten are the best and Babe and Little Bear got some serious freak on!!!! So, I’ve got my neb to do, meds to take and then bed time!

11pm – Bed time and story time. Bagle and hot milk for this mouse and sleep!

Tuesday 29th May 2017: 5.45am – Ok so Fitbit said I slept right through the night! So, I woke you up for a cuddle, cos well I need one! BS 4.3

6.15am – Up meds taken, neb done and shower time with babe. Come out to find my new black satin boy shorts and bra layer out. As well as my blue jersey knee length dresss and my red converses. Babe gave me boxer braids! Wearing a little bit of makeup and my contact as requested!

7am – breakfast time. Scrambled eggs, flat bread, tomatoes, spinach cheese and chillies. With a glass of OJ on the side. Blimey Babe can cook breakfast!

7.30am – Oh bum in a jock strap, English with Bob, really!

9am – Great doctors, again! I know I need to and I must but, I bloody hate it. But then I get to go to work with you J

11am – You told sir beasty on me L oh well working in your office and the view is great. I had a chocalet and banana  protein shake for my snack is that ok?! I also had some almonds! BS 7.4

1pm – Lunch time. Grilled cheese sandwiches, soup, salad and fruit and yoghurt. I’m eating like a baby dinosaur!

1.30pm – I have just noticed the is a lock on your office door!!! Can we, please……

2.30 pm – Ok so really can we please do something?!?! PLEASE!!!! BS 8.2

3.30 pm – See I told you no one would notice and that it would make you smile! But thank you for putting me on your desk and making it all about me, I cannot tell you how much I really needed that! It’s like I feel like I’m going to exploded! Ok so I will be a good girl and curl up on the sofa and nap like a good girl!

5pm – Blimey big man! I was tired! Home time! Can we do the bus?!?!

6pm – home. Aunty May mad veggie stew and dumplings. Delicious!

6.45pm – quick tidy up and freshen up, in to my new red tea dress and off to, where are we going???

7.30pm – Open mick!!! YAY! No singing of JB though, please!!!

9pm – ok you do know I’m getting funny looks being sat on your lap, right?!?

10.30 – Pizza on the way home, Yay!

11pm- Bedtime stories when you tipsy are fun! Thank you for everything about today!

 

Wednesday 31st May 2017: 6.20am – Woke up full of beans! So, can I go take Bella for a walk now?! BS level 5.2.

6.35am – well that was nice! Thank you for having a shower with me! Also, awesome outfit. Batman panties, Red maxi sundress and sandals. No bra. 😉 Hair in a messy bun and make up. Oh, and thank you for letting take the hound out on my own!

7.20am – Lovely walk with Bella and I did not even stop for bagles!

7.30am – Yay! Aunty May made soda falls for bredie!

8am – OMG! Your letting us go to the zoo, all the little off shoots of the big zoo!!!

9am – Ok I hate having to get buses in the UK, but I can do them here, why is that? I also love the fact that men get up and offer me or aunty may a seat!

10am – ZOO!!!

11.15am – Ok had 2 scoops of ice-cream and a banana as snack! Baba said it was ok!

1pm – Lunch time – Cheese salad sandwich, soup (leek and potato), apple and banana. Little bear got told about meeting people next Friday and pipped up in the lunch cue ‘Do I need to take condoms to meet them’ What the flip does she think we going to be doing?!?!?

3pm – So sorry I made Babe ring you. I just worried about missing my afternoon nap. So, I have decided at of the 3 options given, that I will go to bed and hour early. Little bear said she will come with me so I don’t have to go on my own! I had a 2 apples, cheese, and oat cakes for my snack!

5.30pm – Yay! Getting to meet you from work is ace and with all of us is epically ace! Bus home is quite fun and you smooth for caring Aunties May’s bag!

6.30pm – Mexican food and ice-cream for dinner! Bus level 8.5

7pm – I can’t do the Xbox, it makes no senses! Thank you for letting me curl up on the sofa with my book.

9pm – Bath time with the little bear!

9.30pm – Teehee! We have not been in bed all together like this in ages, well not this early! Can we play please! Bagels and cream cheese for bed time snack

11pm – 69’s, dildo’s and fucking from behind! What an end to a fabulous day, thank you x x x

12pm – So why does little bear always want to ‘chat’ before sleeping?! Oh, and remind me to get you to have a word about her wanting to wear a onesie to dinner next Friday!

Thursday 1st june 2107: 6am – Well that was a good nights sleep! Hustling me out of bed this early is not a pleasant way to be woken up, but yeah we got shit to get done.

6.20am – Well what do you expect if you’re going to make me shower with you! I will not let part of you go to work not clean 😉 Green shift dress with a white cardia and brown salt water sandals. Love my gravy bra and panties with daisy on them. Light makeup and hair pinned up at the front.

7am – So getting up too Little bears breakfast is always interesting! Ok she did good. Fruit salad with yoghurt, bran flakes and toast and jam. BS lee 7.4

7.45 – So babe packed my bag and snacks. I have veggies, oatcakes, and dip for this morning. I half a peanut butter and banana muffin and half a white chocolate muffin for this afternoon! I have Everything I could possibly need and yes, I have my water bottle!

8.15 – Ok so I am pregnant and a girl but why can’t I carry my laptop bag?! Oh, I forgot you’re in charge and it’s a man thing right! Love you and yes that was me sassing you!

9am – Yay! Office and studio time! I really could be your PA you know, I’d be a good girl and everything……

10.30am- When to get you coffee, found the breakrooms secret freezer, it has frozen yoghurt lollies, having on top of my snack!

11.30am- I’m off to get lunch. I have google maps on my phone, I have the instructions in my head and for safety I have yours and sir beasty’s number just in case!

12pm – this deli is amaze-balls! First place ever to not looking at me like I’m bonkers for wanting a cream cheese, beetroot and coleslaw sandwich on rye and they sell 7 different type of pickles!

12.20pm – Aww we are having a picnic on your studio floor!

1pm – Well now I know that the door locks and you get extra horny after a big New York sandwich. Also, I have a feeling that’s why I’m wearing a dress. Can I blow you under a sound desk later if I behave!?!?

3pm – I have 6 more slides to do and I’ve finished these bloody presentations. But for now, snack, milk, and nap time!

4.45pm – I was a tired little mouse again! Thank you for the wake up of a kiss and a cup of hot chocolate, the babies thank you! x

6pm – have I started wudderling?! Thank you for carrying my laptop bag and holding my hand J

6.45pm- Why do men keep giving up their seat for me? they don’t in the UK! But sitting down and having you lean down kissing me and rubbing my tummy is nice. Oh, and fyfi I think that people get said bump is your handy work, but if you need to make sure know then, ok! More than happy for you to push my dress up, my panties down and for you to fuck me on the bus if you need ;). pizza for tea, again. Salad and fruit and yoghurt as well!

7.30pm- Bath time with babe! She shaved my pussy for me, see that is why  I love living with women!

8pm – Jammies on and family game of monopoly, we are so rock and roll!

10pm – I swear little one cheats, or tries  to! Good plan in making Aunty May banker. Babe offering sexual favours for Mayfair be the way is not fair!

11pm – apple and cheese before bed time story is delicious! Can we do pen of the damned catch up over the weekend?! Tuck in and sleep! Bus level 6.4

2.35am – Bad dream about the twat! Thank you for letting me have cuddles and sleeping on your chest is going to help! X

Friday 2nd June 2017: 5.45am – Waking me up for breakfast now yes, I will sound grumpy but it’s nothing personal. Getting down stairs to find you made me breakfast and even used my special cup, melts me in to a puddle oh warm goo! Sitting and going through the times online and explaining things to me J

6.20am – Today I will be wearing batman panties, blue t-shirt bra, care bear t-shirt and a denim pinafore dress. With daisy converse pumps. Hair in a messy bun and light make up, but full on red lipstick. (are you going for the Lolita look babe?!) Bus level 4.1

7am – Ok so I am sat writing reports for clients and vets, before 9 am. I’m sorry but I was SOOOO board!

9am – total mood crash! Can I just stay home today, cuddle on the sofa and watch DVDs please L

10am – I can’t make the skype thing work on my laptop and I want to talk to sir beasty! L

10.30 – want to make buggers for lunch and use the grill, but its big and bloody scary! Babe is reading the instructions. I had 2 apples with maple syrup as my snack today!

11.15am – well that’s not fair! What do we eat for lunch now!?!?! Oh, and what do you mean only men touch the BBQ or Grill food on it?!?! Can Aunty may use it, she’s a grown up!

12.30pm – So I’m eating bread, cheese, apples, and ready salted crisps for lunch! Can we have buggers tomorrow? Please!!!!

1.45pm- We are off to Jersey City, Baby shopping!

2.30pm- dear god! Why , oh why did we go in the first store we found! Bloody woman was like oh your big for 15 weeks, are you sure! no, I’m just saying it and really, I just ate all the pies! then she stared tiring to sell me a $550 breast pump, I’m mean WTAF!

3pm – Ok gender-neutral baby gap shopping has made me simmer down!

3’30pm – So not home for nap. (asked babe if she will drive home and I’ll sleep in the car) hot milk and donut for afternoon snack!

5pm – home, dinner prepped and ready to go! Bus level 5.6

6pm – Veggie tagin, cuscus and green beans and tomatoes. Thank you for bringing apple straddle home for pudding!

7pm – We must go out more! Oh, fuck it I am loving family board games and DVDs, even if it means I’m old! And thank you for Indiana jones!

11pm- I did not fall asleep on little bears lap, I was merely checking for light leaks! Bagles, cream cheese and cucumber for bed time snacks are my fav! Story and tuck in time. X x x x x

Saturday 3rd June 2017: 6.45am – Wow I slept late! Feel little today, can we stay home and do stuff?!? Oh yeah got to go in to the city L

7.15am – ok I love these cut offs, thank you! Mini mouse panties, black push up bra (my boobies look obscene!) Green camisole and blue cardie. Light make up and hair in a ponytail. Bus level 3.6

8am- breakfast at the diner! Hash browns (3) grilled tomatoes and mushrooms, 3 eggs scrambled and whole grain toast and strawberry jam. glass of milk and 2 glasses of water! I’m going to go pop!

9am – thank you for letting use go by bus and not driving! I like to get the bus here!

10.30 am Yay! I love looking at art with little bear, she asks questions and I can answer them! Hot milk and donuts are a huge bonus!

12.30pm-  Bs level 7.4 . Salad and bread, with French dressing. Banana for afters! Going for a walk by the river after lunch will be nice.

2.30pm – Bs level 6.2. See that walk got my blood levels down! Now dress shopping for Friday! Yay, thank you for saying no to onesies and lb for Friday! Can I kiss kitten and touch her boobs in the changing room?

3.30 pm – bus home! Aunty May is a legend for getting 4 men to get up for her and the girls. But getting to cuddle on your lap is more fun! Sleepy though.

5pm – How am I asleep on the sofa? We were on a bus!

6pm – ekk! Take out and horror DVDs!

7pm – Ok how much food can I eat in one day! 3 slices of pizza and a massive blow of salad! Oh, chocolate cake and ice cream, go on then!

10.30am – so I feel asleep again! What is wrong with me! Ok jammies on and bed, yes boss man!

11pm – Ok horny now, need sex please! Yes, I am going to be bendy, yes, I’m flashing my butt at you and yes, I’m teasing Babe! What you going to do about it big man;)

1am – holy mother of fuck! I am so going to tease like that again. All 4 of you holding down and doing all that, oh dear god! All I’m saying is I’m not going to be able to walk the morning!

Sunday 4th June 2017: 7.30 am – blimey, not slept that soundly in ages! Housekeeping shower and yes, your cheeky sod I am clean Everywhere now! Change of clit and nipple bars to rings. Blue bra and panties. Red floral tea dress, brown sandals with a blue cardie. light makeup and hair in a bun. Bs level 3.2.

8.15am – Breakfast: two raisen and cinnamon bagels with butter and honey. Banana with yoghurt and glass of OJ. I swear I’m eating for the whole of the family, not just me and 2 growing babies!

9am – Ok we are going to Mass, you promised and we are going. So, stop telling me what you’re going to do to me, comb your hair and put a bloody tie on! *pouts and stamps foot*

9.45ama – will you please behave! We’re moving here and I would like to be able to go to mass without the priest thinking I’m some sex starved maniac!

10.30m – Well thanks for that! You nearly made me squeaky in front of a group of very posh housewives! Knob! Yes I called a knob, what you going to do about big man??? Oh, and I had cake as my snack!

11.30 am – oh dear lord! so I have now defiled 3 churches in 3 countries!

12.30 – blimey I am so hunger, again! Soup, bread, and massive salad! Bs level 6.7

1.30 – Walking Bella here is so much nicer than the UK. Thanks for coming with me. your right an hour is the most I can walk without getting puffed out, we may need to look at getting a walker nearer D-day!

3pm – Dinner is in and cooking, smoothy made for snack and I have changed out of my dress and put my t-shirt on (well yours!) can little bear have a nap with me?! Promise to sleep!

5pm – See told you I need sleep and that we would be good! Time to make pasta!

6pm – ok so duck rage works so well and it is so easy to make! Pasta with tomatoes, mushrooms, and feta for me!

6.45pm – bath time with kitten and we can have a soak!

7.30 – I do not get this Xbox obsession and I can’t play it either, so thank t you for letting me do colouring with little bear! Oh, and please stop topping aunty may’s sherry up! Knob!

9pm – Bed time snack of cheese and crackers, veggie sticks and dip and a yoghurt!

11pm – Bed time story, cuddle and then lights out! Night handsome x x x x x x

Love and hugs,

Pixie x x x x

Dynamics

So this is nearly the end of my Loving BDSM 30 day’s of D/s journey… Does that sound as corny as it does in my head?! So this evening we sat and debated the subject of dynamics within are D/s relationships . It was actually a really in-depth discussion and in many ways I feel its made all of us see that the way we live and how much we care for each other, is not the norm and is not for everyone, but it is also healthy for us, we all take so much from it and for us it’s what we need and very much want. so instead of writing everything we talked about , cos we were talking for like 3 hours and that would take forever, you’re going to get a little bit about each of us, are role in the family and how we get treated as such!

maîtriser, aka the Boss man –  Dom to all of us girls. (poor sod!) Head of the house hold. sadist with a genuine care for are mental and physical welfare . Care giver who has is rules and will punish for any breaking of them, but fairly and with a hell of a lot of creativity. Calm , charming and polite. lastly husband and daddy to be, still getting used to the fact that this time next year he will have 2 screaming bundles of joy! (sorry i should put puke bucket warnings at the start of some posts)

Babe – Sadist Switch, who has a Sub side. She is maîtriser second in charge, who looks after people when they need someone who will fight their corner! Friend , lover and tea making expert . The one who will push button and limits to get the best out of you. has a sweet girlie side that she will show when she trusts you. I will also add that she lives up to the name ‘Babe’ on so many levels.

Kitten – Sub with a masochist streak. she is the one that we all turn to when we need to ‘talk’. the deep thinker of are little family and the go to when I don’t understand something. (why do they do that?) optimist , forgiver and head cheerleader. Always finds a bright side to things even when others can’t find them. For me She is the 2nd biggest love of my life, my best friend and my partner in crime. She my tag teaming partner and my pole dancing buddy. I would take a knife or bullet for without thinking about it, I love her to death!

Little Bear – masochist Baby Girl of the group . Massive tendencies towards Brattyness , but only because she is either anxious or wants to be punished! The one who will go to the ends of the earth to make people smile and laugh . The one Who always has a sunny out look on life and the one who bounces around , being silly! My number one cuddle buddy and my little space buddy! She also , in a way is the person who got me to say out load that I wanted to be a mum and the one I get to be a mother hen a fuss over, I simply adore our little bear.

Me , Pixie aka Mouse or little mama – Well I am Sub, masochist, littleish and housewife of the family. I can’t do pouting, stropping or being demanding , well not really, it just makes me feel odd. I am the one who keeps people organised and on track. I guess I could take house hold management to a different level. I am the pain slut of the group ,  it is my thing! (hmmm Pain!) I’m the one who is happiest making the rest shine and look good , who will sit quietly on the side lines. I am the one who love looking after people and the one who finds it hardest to show that I have a weak side, hell it only in the last few months that I will actually let people look after me when I’m sick! I’m the one who struggles with people saying they love me , with being told that they are clever or pretty or enough. i guess I’m the one with low self esteem and very little conference , but I’m also the one learning to let myself be loved and cared for. i guess I’m saying that I’m just me , little old Pixie!

Well that’s us then! last thing i will say , i was made to write the bit about myself as part of the on going ‘Punishment ‘ thing. Selling myself or say ‘oh i do this well’ is something that i really find hard to do. Lol i have to get Babe to write my CV for me , if i need to send one to a prospective client or with an article i have written or to people I’m going to be lecturing for. Self worth and i have what i would say is a strained relationship!

Hugs,

Pixie x x x x