I’m free! (Sexual Availability)

So last night in bed we decided to discus the latest topic we got from Loving BDSM’s  30 days of D/s which was sexual availability and how I/we feel about it. I felt that bed was the safest place for this chat, seeing as the topic of ‘Orgasm Control’ led to me sort of attacking little bear in the livingroom this afternoon for an hour, .ol. Bad pixie!

So yeah, in my contract with the Frenchman ii is sated that i am always to be available for him sexually and that he is allowed to use my body however he wants for his own pleasure. This i guess is not 100% true , we have the unwritten rule that i can pout and ask for cuddles instead if i have my period. Sorry to say i just don’t feel sexy when I’m bleeding and in pain (PCOS and endro in the house!) But that doe not mean i wont drop to my knees or lend a hard when told to 😉

But for the best part , yeah I will let maîtriser do what he wants and when he wants and where he wants. It has taken a lot of trust and time for me to get that point though, I have for a lot of reasons got major issues round trust and it has taken a lot of bloody hard work with my therapy Doris , a lot of tears and a lot of courage to submit to someone again after what my ex did to me. I think the thing that has helped me the most is that in the time before are D/s and romantic relationship, maîtriser has always been a total gent and one of my best friends. Add to that the fact that over the last 2 1/2 years he has not once done something to breach the trust that i have in hm , you see its very easy to keep trusting him.

As I have said maîtriser seems to be able to pic the right time to make his move. It is a lush feeling knowing that I never really know when his going to do something. I mean at home he will come up behind me and play with my boobs and bite my neck, then spin me round , sit me on the counter and just fuck me. the are the times he comes home from work late from work and I get woken up by him grabbing my ankle and pulling me to him and making me blow his mind . The are the times that ill be putting the cloths away and I get hosted over his shoulder and thrown on the bed. I get like 30 seconds for my brain to write its self before I naked and fucking! (how do men mange to get a womans cloths off so quickly?). Some of the best times have been when we have been out and he decides I need to be reminded who is in charge. I love giving hand jobs in the cinema or theatre. The times I have been told to go to the ladies , remove my panties and give them to him when I get back. I just know his hand is going to inch up my thigh and his going to growl ‘open’. that those fingers will be diving in to my folds and with in mins I’ll be coming hard and trying not to let on! oh , one of the best times was a punishment for leaving the volume on my phone on full in the gym. (you do not ring in the gym) . We got out and he bent me over his car and just fucked me.

The is also the added bonus that my maîtriser is a very handsome guy! He is 6ft 2 , dark hair , beard , muscled and heavily tattooed . but he also has a calm and confident way that his got that women seem to love. He could have pretty much whoever he wants, but he wants me (and the girls). So yeah, I always free for his needs and wants, but he is the same for me, and that means so much to me!

Hugs ,

Pixie

Author: pixieheartblog

Pixie Heart, living a happy polly , D/s life and loving it!

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