You know getting my email every day from the Awesome Loving BDSM inter-elvies is all about Rules , Regulations and the like. Where the flip do I start with that!?!?
Well yeah of course you need rules and regulations in a relationship to make things work! I mean even nilla peeps have them right?! Us being a poly household means we probably have more than people have . We have a set of house rules that was set down so we all know what is allowed and how the tone of the house is. It was for the most part it they are written by me and the girls , but the Frenchie had his say and oked them all. it keeps things running smoothly. We are also very big on talking. again we use this to keep things running smoothly, to air any problems and so we are all singing from the same hymen sheet!
Now on to rules that we have on a 1 2 1 level with maîtriser. For each of us they are different , but have some things in common. like how we are allowed to act in public, what we must call people and what are specific jobs and duties are. They also have what we ask of maîtriser as are Dom . basically keeping us safe , respecting limits and pushing us to be the best we can. The girls ‘contracts’ are roughly 2 or 3 pages long and maîtriser insists we sit down every 3 month to tweak things!
Mine on the other hand is 14 pages long and is a lot tighter than the rest of the girls. I have asked for this for a lot of reasons. Firstly , because my last Dom refused to have any ‘formal’ rules. Maîtriser sat down with me and we discussed what i wanted. secondly as we are married , it is kind of commitment thing. also i have a need for order and things to be a little more than black and white than the girls. (i have anxious ADD) they also cover very aspect of my life , from what i wear , to who im allowed to have contact with and where im allowed to go. I guess to a lot of people they would come across as very controlling and restrictive, but i find them freeing and really helps me with anxiety. (hmmm has maîtriser been using CBT on me without me knowing?!). A lot of my rules are for my mental and physical well-being, as I have a lot of complex health issues . i also have a different way of dealing with rule braking . they get rated from 1 to 5 and i have a list what are rule breaks and the sort of punishment i can expect for them. maîtriser also asked and i agreed that the girls and can give me warrings, for things like putting myself down or spending to long on cleaning . 5 warning will equilee a but kicking! I also have a list of people who I can go to if I’m not doing so good or want advice . they are friends that maîtriser trusted to keep and eye on me (also the girls). We have really world and online protectors.
We also have goals that maîtriser will set us and we set for him! We do this by sitting down and talking about what we want to achieve, get better at or learn. then we write them down, work on them and achive them!
We that’s my thoughts and ramblings on that front. little confused today! lol
pixie x x x x